Experimenting

Have you ever had that "feeling" that you have failed as a parent and then there is the "knowing" you have failed as a parent. I think Jared and I are presently somewhere in the middle. Don't get me wrong I love my little monkeys. But Jared and I have been a little disappointed with the "stepping up to help the family" that they have been displaying or should I say lack of. So we decided to conduct a little experiment. Jared figured that it would work really well since I can't do anything and therefore won't be inclined to go soft. We have stopped doing for our kids. Period. It has been pretty interesting. I guess I should back up and say that we do for them based off decisions they make....I'll explain in a minute.

So far Gunnar has missed the bus, Tuesday's scripture study consisted of just Kennedy and me, the kids got no cooked breakfast on Tuesday (we really thought they wouldn't mind this one because they love cold cereal and live for the weekends when that's what's on the menu--we were pleasantly surprised), and Kennedy miss out on having dessert last night. McKenna, much to her liking, figured out how to get breakfast. After offering to help out with a family chore on her own Jared offered to make her breakfast this morning. She gloated, maybe a little too much, to the others about dad making her an omelet. Gunnar and Kennedy are baffled...and are begging McKenna to spill the beans on getting breakfast. So needless to say poor Gunnar and Kennedy had cold cereal this morning.

It has been kind of liberating. Jared and I just smile at each other when we see the choices they are making. All of their choices are directly related some sort of privilege. Maybe Jared and I are the slow learners but I really realized how much I do for them and how I am not making them responsible for choices. We now don't push, prod, wake up, remind, hound or scramble to help. The yelling has decreased considerably too. I am really interested to see how this progresses. It really is amazing how they are picking up on things in such a short amount of time. I wonder how long it will take for them to like clean clothes........hopefully not as long as it took their mother to realize she was just ruining them.